The Enneagram's Healing Power: Amanda's Path to Emotional Growth
Nov 22, 2023Join us for a powerful and enlightening episode as we dive deep into the world of enneagrams with channeling support for Amanda. Hosted by Amy Hageman and special guest Stephanie Foy, this podcast explores blind spots, family dynamics, and discovering the true essence of self through the lens of enneagrams. Hear from Amanda as she shares her experience, and see how this tool can help you unlock a deeper understanding of your life. Don't miss out on this transformative conversation that will leave you feeling inspired and empowered. Tune in now!
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Blind Spots: Blind spots can be seen as areas we may not pay much attention to, but they hold valuable opportunities for growth and development. By acknowledging and working on these blind spots, we can tap into untapped potential and unlock new opportunities.
Reach Out for Support: It's important to remember that we don't have to go through life alone. Reaching out for support and guidance from those who understand us can help us navigate challenges and discover new perspectives.
Embrace Different Energies: Each of us has a dominant energy or enneagram type, but it's important to welcome and incorporate the others. Doing so, we can achieve a better balance and accomplish our goals more effectively.
Our Families Support Us: No matter how challenging our relationships with family members may be, it's important to remember that they were carefully chosen for a reason. Each member plays a role in helping us heal and blossom into our true selves.
Gratitude is Powerful: Taking a moment to express gratitude can bring about a sense of peace and joy. It's important to acknowledge and appreciate the blessings in our lives, no matter how small they may seem. Gratitude can also help us stay grounded and connected to our inner selves.
LINKS
TRANSCRIPT
Enneagram type and spiritual growth
Amy Hageman 00:00
I'm really excited that the three of us are together to talk about Amanda's Enneagram. Amanda, I've known you for a couple of years lightly, but I feel like I'm getting to really know you now just learning more about your Enneagram. So, before I pass it off to Stephanie, I just want us all to close our eyes really quickly, and just take some breaths. And I'm just inviting in this feeling of gratitude right now for this time that we're going to have together to dive into all that makes Amanda such a gift in the world, and to allow spirit to work through me and to work through Stephanie, to highlight anything that she would benefit from knowing whether that's from her healing or her growth, anything that needs to come through, we trust that our spirit team is active and very present with us at this time. And yeah, I'm ready to get started. All right, Stephanie, take it away.
The Enneagram, an ancient wisdom tool with modern psychology.
Stephanie Foy 00:59
All right. Okay, so before we dive into your type, do you know anything about the Enneagram? Or are we starting from the baseline?
Amanda 01:09
The only thing I knew before today was that there's numbers and very light that like, that's pretty much it.
Stephanie Foy 01:18
Okay, so let me just do a little bit of a primer, so that it puts it in context, the Enneagram. And the work that sort of surrounds the En neagram by some people's belief and work is that it's several 1000 years old, that it originated in ancient philosophies. And in fact, the little symbol in the Enneagram diagram, this, this little symbol right here, is by some accounts, ancient geometry, so there's what I would consider ancient wisdom, embedded within the Enneagram work. And then this particular tool was developed by a group of scientist, so it brings modern psychology and science to this ancient wisdom. So that's why I chose to go and to be certified in this particular version of Enneagram. Now, there's lots of versions out there. But none of them have the scientific validation that this one has. So that's why I thought it was important. But anyway, background on Enneagram.
Amanda 02:36
Thank you. That's interesting. I didn't know that.
Enneagram type 7 and its characteristics.
Stephanie Foy 02:39
Yeah, so I'm in this ancient wisdom. The idea was that there was a way to understand people, and for people to gain an understanding of themselves, that would have the capacity to lead to their self development, and enlightenment. And so the Enneagram transgressed over time, it moved out of the philosophical circles, and it moved into the spiritual realm. And for a long number of years, hundreds of years, it lived in cluster communities of monks and nuns, primarily in the Catholic tradition. And but it was not shared with the common man, because I didn't think that the common man had the intellect to deal with all that the Enneagram had to offer. Of course, in that time, also, it was mostly a verbal tradition. And so there was, people weren't assessed in conversation and through through verbal conversation, so. And as it progressed, it was actually in the 1960s 70s, it started to kind of get leaked out of those clustered communities and into more of the mainstream, and it was actually in the late 60s and 70s, when it became more popular. And there were a number of psychologists who then began to use the Enneagram. And to bring that work out into what we would think of as modern psychology. So that's sort of just gives you the context. I will say that I've been working with the INIA gram now for several years. I've known about it for a number of years. And it just continues to bring more depth and more value. The more I work with it, the more value I get from it. So I hope that's true for you also.
Amanda 04:31
Me too.
Stephanie Foy 04:33
Okay, so let's start by talking about what your how you resonated. So you resonated with a type seven, what we call the enthusiastic visionary. So she smile it must be true.
Amanda 04:50
Yes. So that's one of the things my husband always tells me he's like, you know, Amanda is the miracle manifester, the visionary she has all the like, you know, ideas in her head, and then my husband puts the plan forth to bring that vision to life. So yes,
Stephanie Foy 05:10
So perfect hits you right on good. Well, so um, as the seven we look to sevens to be, you know, I sort of think of sevens as their the fun number on the Enneagram. Because they are tend to be more adventurous than any of the other numbers, they tend to seek new and different experiences more rapidly, then any of the other numbers not that other numbers don't, but not at the same pace as the sevens. I mean, the sevens are like, you know, give me something new today. But I don't have something new today, I am bored.
Amanda 05:47
So very true. Very true.
Stephanie Foy 05:52
Sevens tend to be optimistic, they tend to be very flexible, they tend to be very future oriented. And yet can also be practical, because the sevens have a vested interest in seeing their visions come to pass. So like you said, your husband said, You're a manifester, like, Okay? Sevens have that energy that says, you know, I've got this vision, and I gotta make it happen. Now, where sevens fall down on the other side is that after a bit, they don't have the energy to keep investing in executing the plan. They really just want to get the plan started and let somebody else finish it.
Amanda 06:28
That is so accurate.
Stephanie Foy 06:32
The other thing about sevens, the other downside of sevens is that oftentimes, they don't really want to experience their negative emotions. And they seek to avoid pain at all.
Amanda 06:47
Yes.
Stephanie Foy 06:48
But that's that I don't need to go there. I'll just reframe it. They're excellent at reframing. But
Amanda 06:55
Yes.
Stephanie Foy 06:56
They can sidestep their own growth, when they don't embrace those emotions and go through them rather than try to go around them.
Amanda 07:04
Yes, that is really wanting to be intentional about is going through it. Because I want to heal. So. Yeah,
Stephanie Foy 07:16
It takes from my experience, a real intention from sevens to want to do that, because it's not your natural tendency, just absolutely is not so. But very valuable when you do because it gives you a breadth and depth. In some ways that can be a starter for a new vision. Does that make sense?
Amanda 07:46
Yeah!
Stephanie Foy 07:46
Like, out of the pain out of the process, you might come to a vision that you wouldn't have come to head you got around.
Amanda 07:55
Yep. So exactly.
Amy Hageman 07:57
Amanda, your guides are also saying that in addition to being a seven and that's the seven nature that the like the sidestepping the emotion and like, I just won't feel it. I'll reframe it is also generational patterning.
Amanda 08:12
Oh,
Amy Hageman 08:13
For you, it's a more positive aspect, like you're going to reframe it to something positive generationally, they're saying it was more of a, I'm not going to feel the hurt and said, I'm just going to feel blame, like I'm going to blame somebody else. But so you inherited a healed version of a negative pattern, so to speak.
Amanda 08:33
That's so fascinating.
Amy Hageman 08:36
Does that make sense? Does it resonate?
Amanda 08:38
Yes.
Amy Hageman 08:39
Okay.
Amanda 08:39
Yes.
Amy Hageman 08:40
And so your, your guides want to come in and just applaud you that you're doing the work at this time, where you're really concentrating on feeling the feelings while your children are so young. Because you're preventing them from inheriting the same pattern, or at least opening the door to make it easier for them to heal it. You know.
Amanda 09:00
Thank you.
Amy Hageman 09:01
Yeah. All right. That's it, Stephanie. Continue.
Stephanie Foy 09:06
All right. No worries, no worries. Okay, so I just want to kind of do some sort of check ins about some some of the key pieces. So the world view for sevens is you look to the future, as the world is full of exciting possibility.
Amanda 09:23
Yes, I'm like, we can live anywhere. We could make money any way we can be in any community and make friends and stay connected to the friends we've already made. And there's just choices and abundance, like what's not one path only forever.
Amy Hageman 09:44
That's incredible.
Stephanie Foy 09:45
Right. So, yeah, absolutely incredible. The seven, I mean that it's just such a value and it's a value to the other people around you. Because having that worldview It just opens up, like you said, the possibilities for lots of people who don't have that. And this is what is true for all numbers is that we often get in the thinking pattern of that the way we see the world is the way other people see the world. And we assume sevens assume, because you see all the possibilities. Surely other people do too. And that's not necessarily the case. So sometimes the value is to think about, okay, how can I bring this view? How can I bring this set of perspectives to other people?
Amanda 10:39
Yeah, I would say that that's something that I do question like, How do other people not see this? So?
Personality type and its traits.
Stephanie Foy 10:48
Yeah, um, and you know, the next, the next sort of key thing there is focus of attention. And of course, sevens are going to always be focused on what energizes them, what excites them, what seems like fun to them. And always focus on the future, and not as much on the past, which is valuable to the sevens. But if you're in relationship with other people who have an orientation to the past, it can make for a disconnect. They think, oftentimes, they think sevens don't value what we've been through these things we should have learned from this stuff. And sevens are like, yeah, moving on, moving on. And so there can be a disconnect with those types that have more of an orientation towards the past.
Amanda 11:40
Interesting.
Stephanie Foy 11:41
That's just something to kind of think about. The core fear for sevens is being limited and restricting and restricted not living a full life. And as we talked about, they want to avoid discomfort and pain.
Amanda 11:55
Yes.
Stephanie Foy 11:57
Yeah. And so sometimes, what's the value of knowing your core fear is because sometimes we are acting out of that core fear, because it's so subliminal, it's so that we don't realize that that's, that's where we're from. So it's like, that's just being mindful. Oh, this is this is what's driving me. So let me see if this is if this is real, or not real. So just think about that. And then the self talk is always going to be for most sevens, about how do I experience joy? How do I experience fulfillment, and I have to have freedom. Sevens do not like to feel like they're boxed in?
Amanda 12:48
Yes.
Stephanie Foy 12:49
They just don't. Sevens will, let's say they will put up with structure is not there. It's not their nature. But that to the extent that they feel like, oh, I have to have structure to accomplish my vision, that's enough. But there has to be freedom within that. Like you just said, I can live anywhere, I can work anywhere. That's a freedom, that's a call for freedom.
Amanda 13:14
And I always say like, Why do I have to choose, you know, I want the cookie and the cake, I can have both. I'm not going to be limited to only one like, I apply that in all of my life.
Stephanie Foy 13:29
Yeah, so that sort of gets to the vice, which the vice for seven is called gluttony. Now, most people think about gluttony about people who overeat. But the truth is, it's bigger than that gluttony or sevens is about experiences. I gotta have this and I gotta have that and I gotta have some more. I do this one thing and then that's when enough and I got to do something else. So always looking for more more more more more.
Amanda 13:54
Yep.
Stephanie Foy 13:55
So sometimes the satisfaction or seven is an elusive thing.
Amanda 14:03
Yep.
Amy Hageman 14:07
So with you being a seven, this is this a very loving word of caution from your guides. They're saying I forget I know you have a boy and a girl on ones older ones younger. The younger child
Amanda 14:22
Yes.
Amy Hageman 14:23
Your daughter as she can easily feel like dragged around. Like the seven energy can kind of exhaust her a little bit.
Amanda 14:35
Interesting.
Amy Hageman 14:36
And so it's not anything that you necessarily need to fix. It's just something that you can be aware of or like, Okay, I'm going to maybe I'm going to leave her home for this one adventure or like it. It's like she wants to pick and choose which of your adventures she wants to go on. And she wants to feel like she's at choice and not she's not like along for The Amanda Show. Which is not, it's not what you're doing. But they're they're bringing that up. It's just something to be mindful of.
Amanda 15:07
Yeah, I can see that with her. She definitely doesn't seem as social as our son. And so that that resonates.
Amy Hageman 15:16
Awesome.
Enneagram types and subtypes with a focus on the one-to-one subtype.
Stephanie Foy 15:17
I'm just looking at your report and on page eight, we talked about the strengths and positive qualities. You move towards people and connection, positive tone and approach. You're quick to synthesize things and make connections with folks that it's not necessarily obvious to other people, but it is obvious to sevens. Sevens can be resistant to conventionality and rules, which we already talked about, because they have such a strong need for that freedom. It's so easy project the attitude you can do anything you believe you deserve the best and will pursue the good things in life, you treat people as equals and judge them on their merits. And your social charm as always enables you to be effective as a leader as a group member. I will say that in the United States, we are what's called a 378 culture. So that breeds are competitive achievers, sevens, activision, enthusiastic visionaries, eights, actor controllers. So we value those three types over others in this country, because that's sort of, you know, that if you think about the, sort of the personality of the Americas, it's, it's very, you know, new things push forward, you know, we were built on go best go build this country, you know, that's all very seven energy, you know, and then eight, get it done, you know, and then, and then we're going to be the best in the world. That's the three energy. So that whole the culture reinforces you as a seven. But what you have to be mindful of is okay, have I gone too far to the extreme? Have I, you know, just something to think about.
Stephanie Foy 17:12
So, and then when we look at the challenges for seven, staying focused on one thing can be a challenge. The need for stimulation and excitement, you know, can sort of put you on to ask for self indulgence or access, which we just talked about gluttony, I'm just trying to think if there's anything else that just sort of stands out, um, it's, I don't know you. Again, I think it's just the whole, the whole situation with any with type sevens is to notice their tendency to, to be to give themselves pleasure, and to give themselves new and exciting things. And it's kind of like what I was saying about your daughter, other people around you, sometimes. Other numbers, other types have a real hard time keeping up with sevens. It's just like, it's awesome. Or I can take you in small bits, I can, you know, I'm great, great loved, loved to spend the weekend with you, and I gotta go home on Sunday, not because I gotta rest, you know, or whatever. So, just knowing that can give you insight as to how you show up with other people. What are the strengths you bring, but then also, what are some things that you might just want to be mindful about? So that as you interact with others, okay, so let's talk about some elements of the Enneagram, that some sort of further refinement, because that's kind of your base, but then there's, in our work, there's what's called subtypes and instincts.
Stephanie Foy 19:14
And the three subtypes are self preservation, one to one and social and you are considered a one to one subtype. So the one to one subtype are those people who will focus on those one to one relationships just like itself, so your currency is always going to be in that relationship? Energy, that's where you're going to thrive. That's what you look for. That's the way you want to interact in the world. Whereas the self preservation, their primary concern is just like it sounds. I need to preserve myself and In doing so, feel like I'll be able to maintain myself and others. So their whole orientation. And the truth is every type, all the nine types have each of the three subtypes. So, like, I coach a seven, who's a self pres seven, and I coach a seven, who's so seven, so they're every so they're all every every number has every time. It's just, I am a foodie. So I think about it like ice cream. You know, like, if you have vanilla ice cream, and you put strawberry sauce on that ice cream, you're going to experience that vanilla ice cream one way, then if you have a chocolate sauce on it, you're going to experience it a different way. So it's the same ice cream. seven is seven, but how you how people experience that seven is going to be different based on the subtype.
Amanda 20:50
Okay.
Stephanie Foy 20:52
I don't know if that's a good metaphor, but it makes sense to me.
Amanda 20:56
I mean, I love ice cream. And that made sense to me.
Stephanie Foy 20:58
So people will experience you and you will get your energy, again, from those one to one relationships.
Amy Hageman 21:07
Amanda, did you have any questions about the seven?
Amanda 21:13
I think one of the things I was thinking, as you were sharing was, does your Enneagram change as you you know, age? Or is that something that like, you're born a seven, you're always a seven.
Enneagram types and personal growth.
Stephanie Foy 21:28
So there's different conversations in the community and in the work, most folks in Enneagram work, believe that your Enneagram you come in with kind of a throne as you come in with an orientation. And then that orientation is either nurtured. And you develop fully into that orientation, or you try to override it, but either way, pretty much by early childhood, your Enneagram is set. And then you just start acting it, you know, you continue to be whatever you are the rest of your life. Yeah, how aware of it you are, may come and go. And you may, in lots of people, I find that sometimes depending upon their parent, and Amy was saying, you know, from her channeling that, that you came in with a healthy side of the reframing for lots of people, if they're in unhealthy environments, they may get squashed. They may be you know, they may be tried to be forced into another pattern into a different way of being. And I've had people who, when they take the assessment, they go, Oh, this is who I've always thought I was. But you know, like, I've been acting this other way, because this is the way I was told I needed to be. So lots of people, especially like we were talking about in the American culture, we're a 378 culture. So a lot of people that are not those numbers will try to act like those numbers, because that's what's perceived as value.
Amanda 23:11
Right!
Stephanie Foy 23:12
So it's only and as we have continued to mature both as a country in organizations that we now understand, oh, there's value in, you know, having people show up in their authentic selves.
Amy Hageman 23:28
The other thing that does change is how well you utilize the other numbers. That's like, we all are all the numbers, but seven is who you are as like at your core, you know, and then how you utilize the other energies, it's kind of, it's almost like you could think about it like chakra is like we all have all the chakras, but some of us really hang out in our third eye, and some of us hang out in our sacral. It's like, your core self is a seven. But overtime, and in situations, you might lean towards some other numbers differently to help you get through whatever the situation is.
Stephanie Foy 24:03
So that's a great segue. I'm on page 15 of your report. And we can go back to seven endpoint, any other things that you want to talk about. But we'll just kind of keep going over the highlights because I think there's, to me, there's key elements that I want you to understand as a tool for self development. So as Amy said, first understanding yourself as a seven, and then what type of seven you are and then where the opportunity comes in for stretching growth is to understand how do we use the other numbers? How do I so there's What's the concept called wings. So just like a bird has two wings, like we have two hands. The wings for the seven are six and eight. So those are the numbers that are next to you on the Enneagram dial. And those are the numbers that are the easiest for you to move into because they're the closest to you now, like our handedness, you will probably find that you lean more towards one than the other more naturally. But the opportunity is to utilize those wings. When your things not working intellect, the thing I usually do is not not quite getting me there. Or like in the case of your daughter, when a new thing where you'd want to lean into for her is in towards that six? Because the six is the stable person that's..
Amy Hageman 25:41
The skeptic because such a weird title.
Stephanie Foy 25:43
The loyal skeptic. Yes. But they're they're all about stability, they're all about safety. They're all about they're risk averse. So where as they're still, you can still be optimistic, you can still be positive, but it kind of slows the slow six sort of slows the seven down a little bit, and sort of causes you to say, wait a minute, let me let me let me look at balance here, let me look to see, where do I need to slow these relationships or be more oriented towards safety and security or so that's just something to think about. Because as a seven, it'd be a far stretch for you to go across the whole thing all the way over to four. But you see where six is like, oh, I can just lean into that six. And the same thing is true on the other side, which is the eight. And the eight is the active controller. And those are the people that you know, when I call the large and in charge group.
Amy Hageman 26:56
I say we I'm not an eight at all!
Stephanie Foy 27:03
They get stuff done, they're large and in charge, they sort of don't care who they offend on the way to their achievements. Because you know that, that sort of, so in some cases, you know, and I'm not, there's value in that eight, energy, there's value in that, like, I'm gonna get things done, you know, I'm telling you, if I was in a fire, I'd want to, they're gonna know what to do. And they're gonna get the, you know what I mean? So, there's some places where that eight really has value. And so sometimes when a seven, so a couple of things can happen. One is I've gone out here, and I've gotten created this, you know, cafeteria of all these experiences, and I've got all these things to do. And I've got all these ideas. So engaging with the eight can give you help you develop that plan, how do I how do I execute on these ideas? How do I move into manifesting into moving forward, these ideas, eight energy can do that for you. So they also have that ability, where as a seven can bring people along in terms of the vision, and eight can bring people along to help you get things done, right. So it's kind of a different if you think about that. So just to begin to think about the wings as an opportunity to broaden and to stretch into lane. That's like, okay, when either I feel stuck as a seven or, you know, I'm mindful of one but other people and or something I need to accomplish. Let me look to how I can do that. Helpful?
Amanda 29:05
Yes, that's so helpful. I can really see how I can, like you said lean into a little bit on either side of these. I don't want to say easily but more easily than like you said like a four or one when I'm looking at those like the the six and the eight seem like I I can see those qualities in me at times too.
Numerology and family dynamics.
Amy Hageman 29:26
And the six is a bit more challenging for you than the eight.
Amanda 29:32
I would say that yes. I would say it's a lot easier to go towards. Yeah.
Amy Hageman 29:37
The guys just want to talk about that real quick. I mean, a just like Stephanie said earlier, it's kind of like handedness, left hand right hand like which one are is easier for you that it's easier for you. And that's an interesting dynamic in your marriage is what they're saying is like, when is it that husband's gonna Take action and when is it that you're going to be the eighth, because husband's so attracted to your seven, like so attracted. And then the eight is like emasculating would be too strong of a word. Like it's not like it's the emasculating. But it's like a little bit of a put off, like, like, maybe he feels a little bit lost or something. So it doesn't mean that you don't need it, because you do need the eight. But that's one of the dynamics to be aware of. And what they want to say about the six for you is they want to confirm what Stephanie said earlier about how the six might be more helpful when when, if you get the sense that that your daughter is feeling like, dragged along. Here's what's happening that I see. So clearly, it's like, when you have a vision, you're having a vision of your whole family. And it's like, we're doing this and you're seeing the whole family. And a lot of the time she's right there with you. And she's in the vision. And it's like, Yeah, Mom, let's go. But some of the time, it's like, no, that's your vision. And I'm back here. Like, like she kind of wishes she could opt out. And so the what your guides are saying is, when you lean into that six, that's gonna give you the kind of the slow down and the time to have the mental process of is everybody really on board? Or have I just envisioned this? And I'm envisioning it, but no one else is really with me if that makes sense.
Amanda 31:28
Yeah, yeah.
Amy Hageman 31:29
I feel like I just said everything that we've already said. But yeah.
Amanda 31:34
No, no. So I was I was gonna say that. One of the things that my husband says sometimes is like you're being too nitpicky or like, just let me do this. I have the plan some something like that. Right. So what you said about leaning into the eighth, sometimes it is a challenge, because then it's like stepping on toes. And so I see that in our marriage. And then I think, yeah, our daughter is, is just very, she allows me to reassess slowing down for sure. And it has opened my eyes to saying no, sometimes to things that I would typically say yes to, because I feel like we as a family need to recharge at home, and give her and us a break from something that the other three of us would be like, here we go, you know, and just like power through charge on. But with her energy, I can see how it, it causes an awareness and our family dynamics to be a little different.
Amy Hageman 32:41
Which is so beautiful that you're so on top of it.
Amanda 32:46
I mean, I, I, hopefully I can tune in more times than not. But yes, I'm trying to be more aware.
Stephanie Foy 32:53
A thing that you can do is you can ask yourself, how would I see this? How would a six, interpret this? What perspective would a six bring? Or an eight I liked? But that's a that's kind of a clue like, Oh, let me just pause a minute. And this is a way for sevens are excellent at reframing. We've already said that. So you just reframe it and think about okay, how can I view this as a, as a sixth person who's interested in stability and safety and, you know, this more risk averse, right?
Amy Hageman 33:32
Like, I just want to add one more thing about your daughter, and then we're gonna move on. What they're saying about her is that her whole world is internal. And so when she doesn't have enough time to herself, it's like she's, she just hasn't even had time to be yet. Because all of that is like..
Amanda 33:52
Interesting. Okay.
Amy Hageman 33:53
It's fun, and it's great. And she appreciates it, but it's almost like she's outside of her body. When she has too much social. She's a very internal, she loves it. It's like get into my clamshell, I got this whole world inside my clamshell, you know, she loves it in there. And so that just might be a helpful framing for you because it is also like we're going to exhaust her and overstimulate her that all of that is true. But it's also like, Okay, what I love is to do the vision and do the next thing. But what she loves is to go into her world which her world exists inside of herself.
Amanda 34:34
And that makes so much sense.
Stephanie Foy 34:36
And how old is she?
Amanda 34:37
She's two.
Amy Hageman 34:39
She's so little, I was thinking she's like four.
Amanda 34:43
No, she's two and our son is four.
Stephanie Foy 34:47
All right. So one of the other key elements that I want to share with you is a long way down your report on page 23 and this is where that sort of ancient geometry comes in. You'll see in that little graph that as a seven your connected to the one and the five. And the five is your release point. And the one is your stretch point. So again, again, I'm a foodie. So I think about the five, like, have you ever worked with the pressure cooker?
Amanda 35:29
Yes, yes.
Stephanie Foy 35:31
And you know, that at some point, you have to relieve the pressure before you can open the pot.
Amanda 35:37
Yes.
Enneagram types, stretch points, and personal growth.
Stephanie Foy 35:38
So, to me, the, the release point is always like, what's the thing that's going to let the pressure off the pressure cooker? So your release is the quiet specialist. So that's like, that feels like opposite energy. That's like, why is it so slow, though internal, be still look for go deep in something rather than spread the waterfront, which is what sevens usually like to do, like, have a lot of experiences. They're like, No, they're telling you, this is an opportunity to deepen, go deeper and go. So go slower, go quiet or go. And that that will actually center you. And it's so counterintuitive to most sevens. But the truth is, embracing that five actually can give you more energy than to take out into that seven experience. But if you just go like the Energizer Bunny, it's like at some point, you got to recharge. So the five is the opportunity to release the stress, move into recharge, move into centering. And that's also a place I tell people that are sevens. And most sevens, just go what want me to do what, you know, like, maybe do a journal, maybe do some sort of quiet practice. And that's a place to consider doing some work around those feelings, especially those ones that as sevens you tend to avoid right?
Amanda 37:21
I love journaling. And I've gotten back more into it recently. And I call my space my Zen Den. And I tried to have it like, you know, I like write down my quotes that are, you know, resonate with me and I have my Oracle deck and my mala beads and my crystals, and I'm trying to be more intentional about my space, and then actually taking the time to, you know, hone in and center and give myself the time to be in that space instead of just having the items. But, you know, engaging with them in the way that recharges me in a different way.
Stephanie Foy 38:01
What was interesting is when you said all that, yeah, only a seven would have I have my cards and the smorgasbord. I didn't you know, other items? Very interesting.
Amanda 38:16
My gluttony. My gluttony. Yeah.
Stephanie Foy 38:20
Okay. And then one, the stretch point is the strict perfectionist. Now, what they say in your report is, it's likely to be the point of stress. But I also look at the stretch point as the place where, when what you've normally done does not work, you are up against it, you are up against it, and you need to figure out some other way to make something happen. One is going to be the place where you gotta go. Because so that's the one the value of the one is just to look at, okay, when when what I normally do doesn't work, or I need to do something different. You know, how am I going to stretch into something? So one is that opportunity. Now you go what one is, the strict perfectionist is like, Okay, what does that look like for a seven? Well, it's about control. It's about self restraint. It's about checking the details, which for some sevens, it's like, oh, this is just, you know, agony. But it's the thing, no matter what your number is. For all numbers, whatever is their stretch point and we will tell you, her stretch point is about if it's like, pulling teeth, but it is the thing that can help you over the hump, when you've, you know, like when you're just reaching up to a hard spot. It's like, okay, this is the thing that maybe I can, if I embrace this part, it's going to give me a different perspective.
Amy Hageman 40:20
Earlier, Stephanie said, you would ask like, what, what is six do for me, I have to ask my stretch point number for me, my stretch is the eight. When I'm absolutely like, I've tried everything and it's not working. I have to go to what what the eight do because I haven't tried the eight like, I know, I haven't, because it's so not natural for me. But then that Oh, for me, that always is like, the carrot that dangles? It's like, hello, Amy. Like, this is the answer. And that is the thing, I don't always accomplish it, but it at least gives me the insight of of my next path.
Amanda 41:01
I love that.
Stephanie Foy 41:02
Okay, so we've hit the major points, five, seven, subtype, one to one relationships, the wings, six and eight, stretch and release lines, five and one. So now, let's talk about what questions you have. What's something you're working on that you think let me how could I look at this through the Enneagram lens? What would be helpful?
Amanda 41:30
I'm just like, there's so many things you share that were so in just eye opening? For me? I think one of the things just from what we just talked about was, you know, how, how do I like, say, on a path with my ideas, when I feel overwhelmed with my ideas, right? Like I have my like, brainstorm, you know, of all the things, and then to stay on a path is very challenging for me. And then I get overwhelmed. And I have my sticky notes. And I have my notebook with all my ideas. And then I'm just like, overwhelmed and feel like the vessel is, like you said overflowing without like, you know, what do I do?
Stephanie Foy 42:22
Right? So I would say two things, I would say, use that time, use that quiet time to help create that focus that use that five, that release point that you know, that deep, quiet focus, and then connect that with your aid energy. Because that active controller, those folks there like to get it done kind of folks. So they almost can sometimes have hyper focus on the accomplishment. So those two things might help you if you think about. Okay, I've got this whole range of things, which is great. sevens are visionary, I keep having the visions, but it's like, Okay, what's mine to do right now? Ask that question. What's mine to do right now? In that, in that deep contemplation, period? What, what's up for me? And then how do I enact it? What's my action steps, because you also read active controller as action. So that's the action part.
Amanda 43:26
Okay.
Stephanie Foy 43:27
So combining those two perspectives, with the vision that you have.
Spiritual manifestation and strain profiles.
Amy Hageman 43:33
Here's what spirit wants to say about that. What spirit says is that sevens are so visionary that they move faster than the speed of manifestation. Whereas other numbers can't keep up with their manifestation. And they don't even realize that they've manifested stuff because they're not in touch with their vision and the way the manifestation process works the same way. So the opportunity for you is to decide to go into either the sixth or the eighth, but to decide which of these visions do I want to enact? That's or to say, I have so many good ideas. I'm gonna let spirit figure out which one is the one that's in the highest and best for all involved.
Amanda 44:24
Yeah.
Amy Hageman 44:24
And your guides want to be very clear that it's always it's always both it's always I'm deciding and spirit. But when it comes to I have so many ideas and so many visions and like, we could have them all that it's okay to choose between, what do I want to create? And then what do I want to see if it will just be made manifest while I sleep? Like it's okay to decide. These are the ones I really want to take action towards. And I'm just gonna like, put my manifestation vote towards these other ones for Spirit to bring to me. And to just know, essentially that, that struggle of I have more visions than what I have time to enact, that's not going anywhere. Like, that's, that's a lifetime, you're never just gonna be like, these are the three things I'm working on. That's not gonna be your journey. And so go into the six to help you like get clear on, what is it that I want to take action on? And what am I willing to allow spirit to take over? And what they also say is, you'll notice that some of the things that fall away, come back. And you'll be like, Oh, I had that vision two or three years ago, and now it's back. And so if that, if that helps you to release some of those things where you're like, but it was so good, you know, it would have been so great. It helps you to release to be like, you know, it'll come back in another form.
Amanda 45:56
Yes, I really I like that perspective, for sure.
Amy Hageman 46:00
Awesome.
Stephanie Foy 46:01
What other things would be of interest to you? I mean, there's so much in this report. I mean, you just saw that there's 20, some odd pages. So we clearly didn't cover everything. But I don't want to overwhelm.
Amanda 46:11
Yeah.
Stephanie Foy 46:11
I want you I want to give you enough, yeah, that you've got a start and something to work with.
Amanda 46:17
I think one of the things I was curious about was the physical or sorry, the psychological strain. If you could talk more about that, or just like any of these strains, but you know, the strain profile, I had, like, very curious about what that is. But I just my psychological strain is very high. And I would agree with that not knowing really what that all means.
Stephanie Foy 46:39
Okay, so let me say this about all of the strength profile. Of all the things in this report, this is a moment in time snapshot.
Amanda 46:48
Okay.
Personality type and personal growth.
Stephanie Foy 46:50
So now, why is that valuable? Because we're all here in this moment in time. So understanding what's our current strain profile is just another way for us to look to see one, you know, self understanding. And then also think about what can I how can I utilize the tool of the innie gram to look at my current circumstances? And maybe it just some things? That helpful? Yeah, so don't feel like this is permanent, this is temporary. And this is absolutely, at the time you took the assessment. So weeks ago, you might have been going through something that was two or three days, when you took it that caused you to feel that rehab, this reflection. So we'll just say that don't don't feel like this is like, Oh, my integrand is permanent, always gonna be there straight. And they're not enough. No, it's just a moment in time. That makes sense. So let's, we'll just go through each one of these. So, um, and the first one is the environmental strain. That's obviously, your environment. And it's like, it's not, you don't feel like it's perfect. It's not bad. It's just maybe not where you want it to be. And again, sevens are so visionary, you know, like, they you see the house completely finished. And you may be at a place where, you know, it's 80%, but it's not 100%. But that that'll cause strain to a seven, because you have such a strong vision of how you want your environment to be how you want it to function. And so anything that doesn't meet that vision, it's going to, you're going to experiences some degree of stress.
Amanda 48:34
I would agree with that.
Stephanie Foy 48:37
Okay, and then, um vocational strain, again, that's looking at your career, what you're doing, you know, lots of sevens experience vocational strain, because being committed to one thing, can are being committed to a job can feel limiting to a seven. And it's like, oh, but I want to do this and I want to do that. And I got this other thing. And so that, again, remember we said the core focus for sevens is that freedom, what they're seeking is freedom. So, for some people, for some sevens, they experience more vocational strain just because of the feeling of limitation. Okay, like they're not getting to do all the things that they think they would like to do right in their career in their work. So so not unusual and again, part of that can also be about liking the some of the six is integrating that five energy and that leaning into six, because again, six is about stability. And so like I can I can be okay with this job. I can be okay with this work or this place in my career, and know that I have this other vision that will come when the time is right. But I can, I can experience a certain degree of satisfaction if I lean into that sector sickness. Okay, physical strain you rated as high. And now that you say you have a two year old, it's not surprising, truthfully, young parents I think are always under high physical strain, it's just a lot, their little kids are a lot. So um, but that also just as an indication that you probably want to pay attention to some self care and slowing down. And again, it's that it's both the conditions, you're in the age of your children. And combined with being a seven two wants to experience a lot of things, and I've got all this energy, and I'm going to do this, I'm going to do that. But then taking that time to sort of recenter do some self care work that can and attend to your own sort of physical needs. Because again, sevens are outwardly focused, for the most part, like you're in that you're that one to one relationship, so you're going to be focused outwardly on those relationships, says, this says you need to take some time for yourself.
Amanda 51:23
Yeah, that that's, I'm learning to be more focused on that in this phase of life with young kids.
Stephanie Foy 51:33
Yeah, low strain on your interpersonal life. So as Amy said, your husband probably loves you as a seven, your relationship is not a source of stress, and that you feel supported and like you can be who you are in the context of your relationships.
Amanda 51:53
I do. I feel really, really grateful for that.
Stephanie Foy 51:59
And that, okay, so psychological strain, that was when you asked about now been going through everyone?
Amanda 52:03
This is good.
Self-compassion and happiness for high-achieving individuals.
Stephanie Foy 52:06
Yes, um,it's kind of like what you were saying, you experience strain. When you feel like, Oh, I've got all these ideas, and I can't figure out which one I need to work on. That's the psychological strain. That's the like, oh, my gosh, I've got more ideas than I got time to do with and I've got this. And I got that. And I got this other vision. So in looking at that, it, it's counterintuitive, because sevens feel so strongly attached to their visions, and that creative process, but it can, like I'm spending 1000 ideas, but then how am I going to get them done, and then not getting them done causes me to have strain that, oh, I'm not achieving what I believe is my vision. So it's that that's where you kind of get sort of, I had an image of a gerbil on a on a wheel or hamster on a wheel. Like, you know, I can run fast, I can run faster. Let me run faster. No, it's like, okay, at some point, you got to stop, get off the wheel, take a little timeout, and then refocus and set some priorities. And know that those things that are part of your vision, you know, I am I tell sevens a lot. I don't know what your thoughts are. But until seven, you know, maybe you just need to affirm divine timing. There's divine timing and all things. And let me just move into a place of surrender, peacefulness, and know that my visions I can hold on to them, and they will come in divine time.
Amanda 53:50
Yep.
Amy Hageman 53:51
So they say part of your part of the strain of this phase of life is that you feel like you have to move slower than you want to move. Because of kids and like, all the circumstances. And so whenever you do have your quiet time, they want you to sort of what's I don't wanna use the word, they just want you to give yourself compassion, at knowing that like, I'm in a time, that's harder for me at my physiological self, even though mentally logically, I'm fully here, I chose this I love this time, in my body, at my core self, it's a challenge to move this slow. And so to just give yourself extra compassion, like they say, if you could just start every session, every session where you're where you go to your end and just be like, I'm starting this by sending myself compassion that this is this time I really like like, it's, it's not that you're not good at it. It's not that you can't hack it. It's just that it's an added stress to make you slow down. And so just I'm sorry, this time by giving myself compassion, because I am being forced to do something that that is not natural for me. On top of all the lovely things that I've chosen to do, you know, they say that that practice is going to help you, and they want to win you, you're imagining that this compassion, they want you to sort of imagine as if you're your own great grandmother. And it's like, your great grandmother's gonna step into the room, this is I've never had this come through for a compassion exercise. But your great grandmother's gonna step into the room and kind of pick you up like you're like a three year old, and like, kind of toss you up in the air and be like, Oh, it's so nice to see you. And like, sort of celebrate that you're with yourself. And that they want you to be your great grandmother's self, because that's like we can we can feel unconditional love better when we imagine an ancestor than when we're imagining ourselves. But it's like, if you could delight in yourself, and here I am with myself. And I'm just having compassion for this journey of life. And the other reason why the great grandmother figure is handier than than just like a mirror, is because from that perspective, you can see that this is all temporary, that this is one phase of life. And so imagine that your great grandmother is going to come and she's going to pick you up and sort of swing you around. And then we're just going to hold and squeeze and nuzzle. And just be at like, Yes, honey, this is a time and you're doing so great. And you're like it's so good. But also it's a time and let me just hold you. And it doesn't necessarily, it doesn't have to be like, I'm a mess, and I need to cry in life as hard. It could genuinely be a joyful thing. But just having that sort of energy of somebody that has this broad perspective of time, that is so cherishing of all that's great about you, and at the same time as holding, and this time is challenging. So just imagine that pygar comes in to help you with the self compassion, they say is a handy thing for you. I've never had a great grandmother archetype come through in a compassion exercise. So I like that homework. That's cool.
Amanda 57:10
That was really beautiful. Thank you.
Stephanie Foy 57:12
Well, I'm thinking this sort of to me, like the next step in your exercise is like, Okay, do that be compassionate. And then when we're looking at this happiness thing that says, Oh, you've got a low level of happiness, it's like, well, not surprising. Sevens always are looking at the future. They're always looking at what else can I accomplish? Where else do we need to be? Oh, you know? So it's hard to have a recognition that what brings me joy, what gives me happiness? Because happiness is not in the future, which is where sevens want to live? Yeah. But happiness is in the moment. It's in the day. So that's the thing you might think about it, add to your journal, write three things down every day that makes you happy. Today, what made me happy today. Now what's gonna make me happy next week, or next month. But what made me happy TEDx, right? So because, again, that seven energy is so future focused. It's so visionary, which is great, but it has it sometimes can make it hard for you to or sevens experience happiness, because they're fixated on what's coming next. Yeah, that helpful about the strain profile?
Amanda 58:30
That was all so enlightening. And I feel like, gives me a lot to think about, and lots of value. And, yes, thank thank you so much.
Stephanie Foy 58:43
Good. Okay. Anything else? What else would be helpful? What else would you like to know now that we've kind of dove into the major concepts and pieces?
Enneagram numbers and their applications in life.
Amanda 58:53
I guess my my last other question I can think of is, you know, how, how do you apply this to life? Like, on the daily or like, how do I integrate this more with my kids and my family?
Stephanie Foy 59:14
So I would say a couple of things. One is, I like to just check back over because there's, there's good prompts in the report about exercises you might want to do or things you might want to think about. So I just try to keep those questions at hand. Like one be mindful, I'm looking at this as a three or as a two or a four or what a seven. How else would a seven look at this house would have six look at this house. Would it eight look at this, or remind myself? Oh, I'm feeling stressed. And like, what else can I do? Because typically what we do as humans, is we just think to do more of what we're already doing. was like, Oh, let me just do some more that that will surely take care of it. No. So the value the opportunity is to say, Okay, what did I learn? Okay, as a seven, where can I go to get some relief? Where can I go to do things differently? I can look at my wings, I can look at my lines, those are opportunities for me. Or even if I just say, as a seven, these are my blind spots, these are the things I'm likely to not be paying attention to. Let me slow down. Let me see. Let me look at the things that I don't typically pay attention to. Because there's probably some opportunity in there for me.
Amanda 1:00:36
That's huge. The blind spot. Okay. Yeah.
Amy Hageman 1:00:39
That's the one.
Stephanie Foy 1:00:44
All right, well, and they're all written out. There's a there's a list of your blind spots on page. Let me go back to
Amy Hageman 1:00:50
Those blind spots are helpful.
Stephanie Foy 1:00:52
Yep. Seven, seven, and they're pretty well laid out. And not all may hit you. But that's an opportunity just to think about okay.
Amanda 1:01:05
Yeah.
Stephanie Foy 1:01:07
So that's where I'd say start there, dive Reno read back over this, again, sort of make any notes, you know, I mean, knows how to get a hold of me, you can text me or email me and say, Hey, I came up with this, or this, this popped in. So um, yeah, feel free to reach back.
Amy Hageman 1:01:23
Thank you so much. So I'm gonna have the guides walk us out. But before I do that, I just want to kind of say, again, the value is that it's like the fish discovering water. You know, when, when I learned about my Enneagram number, the first thing I thought was, well, duh, of course, that's me. And the second thing I thought was, this, this is my whole life, like that my whole life is sort of consumed. By this, I'm always solving for this. And so realizing that I'm on one hand, I'm always gonna solve for my number. But on the other hand, if I could welcome in some other energies, I would actually accomplish what I'm getting at better. So it's just like, it's literally understanding the air that you breathe, you breathe, vision and adventure and abundance and optimism. And all of those are wonderful things. And so it's just knowing, but not everybody else can keep up. And I, I have more visions than can manifest in the time that I would like to allow. And just knowing that those dreams are always going to come back for you come back for you, the ones that don't manifest like right here and now. And what the guides really want to also, we've had this discussion before, but your family was so carefully chosen
Amy Hageman 1:02:59
All families are carefully chosen, but your family was so carefully chosen, and you came in to support one another, and help one another. Heal and blossom. Some families, it's like we can't we had a needle each other, we had to do that. But yours, so carefully chosen to help one another heal. And so to just know that, anything that if you go back and listen to this, and we're all like slow down, because your daughter is feeling left out. Don't take that on as like a It's not that it's coming in in an ideal time for you, because you already knew that and you were already on top of it. And so they're just affirming that you already know. And you're already living this. And this just helps you have another lens and another vocabulary to do what you've already been doing. Okay, and so I'm just going to close my eyes gently, because I just want to feel this moment of gratitude. And we're inviting in all of Amanda's spirit team, ancestors guides, ascended masters, everyone that is here, angels. And we're just going to take a brief moment and collectively send love and pure source energy to Amanda and we honor the seven that spark of creativity and abundance and optimism. We honor the light and the joy and the expansion that Amanda's energy brings into this world. And we honor all the work that she does to incorporate all the other numbers that she needs for her life and her family. And we just thank you for this time to all be together. And we ask that our guides continue to allow us to evolve and to grow, and continue to give us the insights that we need or that we would benefit from as we do so. And Amanda and Stephanie, I just want to thank you so much for your time and agreeing to be on the podcast. What a joy!
Amanda 1:04:59
Thank you so much my heart is so full. I feel so enlightened, so much value and just so much gratitude. Thank you bothIt.
Stephanie Foy 1:05:09
It was great to meet you and great to get to know you and we will wish you well on your journeys.
Amy Hageman 1:05:16
All right, thanks, everyone.
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